Faith Journey - Carl Schultz

When asked to participate in the Faith Journey Series I hesitated, wanting to say "no." Hoping to be released I responded to Dr. Lewis with a disclaimer that I share with you now. Normally disclaimers appear in small print at the bottom of an advertisement or are spoken rapidly at the end of a commercial. But today, in chapel, my disclaimer is right up front. I told Dr. Lewis that I had not been abused as a child although I grew up in the poverty typical of the depression, that I had had no spectacular conversion following a juicy and exciting life of sin, and that I had had no sensational call to the ministry, which would keep you students on the edge or your seats. But he persisted and here I am.

I am reminded of the little boy who put forth great effort to memorize his assigned verse of Scripture "It is I. Be not afraid." The day of the Sunday school program came in which he was to deliver his verse. Visibly shaken by the large audience, his well-memorized verse slipped away from him, resulting in the reversed edition of the text being recited. Instead of It is I. Be not afraid," it became, "It is only me and I am scared to death."

Well, I am not scared to death but it is only I. What you see is what you get.

Now that you have heard my disclaimer you can resume your resting or return to your studying -- although it may must be that most of you would say essentially the same thing about your spiritual pilgrimage. After all, how many times can the spectacular happen and yet remain spectacular?

Don't misinterpret my disclaimer. It is not a denial of providence, a minimalization of grace and mercy, or an ignoring of countless answers to prayer -- none of these-- rather a recognition of consistent and persistent, often subtle and at times virtually undetectable divine influence.

Unlike Paul my conversion was quite unspectacular and fails to be incorporated in any volume -- such as Acts -- of outstanding conversions. Unlike Paul I had not been kicking against the goads. Unlike Paul I cannot remember any time when I would have needed to say to Jesus, "Who are you, Lord?"

From my earliest recollections I loved Jesus and wanted to serve him. I did not pass through any rebellious stage. As a result I have no dirty linen to hang out -- sorry -- for such can be the most interesting aspect of (the focal point of) a spiritual journey. Obviously, not that I was without sin and in need of forgiveness but rather no memorable rebellion.

There was an increasing awareness of my relationship to Christ. There were many visits to the altar, many times of personal prayer, but no particular time or place which I can identify as the instance of my conversion. I simply cannot remember a time when I did not seek God.

Likewise relative to my call to Christian ministry -- one which was rather well-defined from the start -- a calling involving the pulpit and the desk, the academy and the ekklesia -- was not dramatic, simply an increasing awareness that God's will for my life was ministry. I relate to Amos who deferred, "I am no prophet nor a prophet's son, but I am a herdsman and a dresser of sycamore trees and the Lord took me from following the flock, and the Lord said to me, 'Go, prophesy . . .' "

I did not come from a family of preachers or scholars. Although designated in my high school graduating class of 730 students as "our preacher to be," many must have questioned my aptitude and my ability and as Amaziah suggested to Amos that he return to his life as a herdsman, thought that I should carry on in a non-professional life.

It wasn't that I didn't have academic ability. I ranked very high in my graduating class of 730 -- I was an avid reader, being told by librarians that I read too much and read too advanced literature for my age but lest you think I was simply a bookworm I would tell you that in 7th grade I was working some 30 hours per week during the school year and 60 hours per week in the summer months, such a heavy schedule preventing me from participating in track which I would have greatly enjoyed.

But people looking for the gifts and grace essential to ministry could not but have concluded that I possessed such in a very minimal way. Shy, quiet, plain looking, uncharismatic -- hardly a candidate for ministry.

But then I take comfort in the memo that Jesus of Nazareth allegedly received from the Jordan Management Consultant's based in Jerusalem. This has been leaked to me but due to possible criminal indictments I cannot reveal its immediate source:

Memo

Thank you for submitting the resumes of the 12 men you have picked for management positions in your new organization. All of them have now taken our battery of tests, and we have not only run the results through our computer but also have arranged personal interviews for each of them with our psychologist and vocational aptitude consultant.

It is the opinion of the staff that most of your nominees are lacking in background, education, and vocational aptitude for the type of enterprise you are undertaking. They do not have the team concept. We would recommend that you continue your search for persons of experience in managerial ability and proven capability.

Simon Peter is emotionally unstable and given to fits of temper. Andrew has absolutely no qualities of leadership. The two brothers, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, place personal interest above company loyalty. Thomas demonstrates a questioning attitude that would tend to undermine morale. We feel that it is our duty to tell you that Matthew has been blacklisted by the Greater Jerusalem Better Business Bureau. James, the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddeus definitely have radical leanings, and they both register a high score on the manic depressive scale.

One of the candidates, however, shows great potential. He is a man of ability and resourcefulness, meets people well, has a keen business mind and had contact in high places. He is highly motivated, ambitious and innovative. We recommend Judas Iscariot as your controller and right-hand man. All other profiles are self-explanatory.

We wish you every success in your new venture.

I repeat, no spectacular call to ministry, no thunderstorm that shook a Martin Luther to give up law to study theology, no burning bush which sent a reluctant Moses back to Egypt, no fleece wet and/or dry, which convinced Gideon of his calling, no shaking of the pivots of the thresholds which caused Isaiah to volunteer his service. None of these. Rather a steady, growing, expanding awareness of God's call which was so certain, although not spectacular, that I have never questioned for a minute -- even in the most difficult times -- that God had called me. Not that I haven't frequently felt inadequate, but then no person is adequate . But always an awareness that I was doing what God wished me to.

If not the sensational or the spectacular, what then? A persuasive and provoking providence, often recognized post facto. My life is a witness to the fact that God is not restricted to the great wind so strong that it splits mountains, not restricted to the earthquake nor to the fire but in the words of the NRSV" a sound of sheer silence." That's how Elijah encountered the Lord and such was my case -- a sound of sheer silence -- but the text tells us that Elijah heard it! And I heard it! Quiet persistent, persuasive, provoking providence, all of which is visible in my remaining remarks.

The death of my father while I was still a kid resulted in my growing up in poverty, being forced to grow up prematurely, entering the work force at an early age, but even though I still feel cheated today, my dad now being dead almost 60 years, it all resulted in a discipline which has enabled me to maintain equilibrium in a life which has been extremely busy and demanding.

I must in the context of providence refer to my 5 years of Latin in junior and senior high school. It exposed me to a wonderful teacher, a Miss VanDeport, an Episcopalian, now long deceased -- an unusually gifted teacher who stimulated in me a love of classical languages and who took me aside and convinced me that if I were to be a clergyman I needed a liberal arts education.

Providence is apparent in my indirect arrival at Houghton as a student. I was accepted to come to Houghton, all necessary details had been cared for but due to pressure from my local church and my conference which frowned upon Houghton, I was diverted to what is now Malone College -- then Cleveland Bible College. Here the most wonderful of all things happened to me. I met my wife, Annalee, with whom my ministry would have been incomplete yea impossible -- my wife, my confidant, my greatest supporter, yet my most vocal critic, the steadying influence in my life, a person much more sensitive to God's leading than I -- and the mother of our three wonderful children. I finished by studies here and then entered Houghton.

After completing my baccalaureate degree at Houghton I was confronted with a significant decision: seminary or university? I was accepted at Temple Theological Seminary with a pastorate assignment in Wilmington, Delaware, but also accepted at Wheaton College. It was an agonizing choice.

I remember when the decision was finalized -- to go to Wheaton and to pursue university study. It was at Lake Front Stadium in Cleveland, Ohio -- watching the Yankees again defeat the Indians -- which, incidentally, always confronted me with issues of theodicy -- that I finally felt confident of my move.

I need to add that the financial arrangements necessary for me to study both at Houghton and Wheaton were made by Ms. Vera Barker, a high school teacher who spent some years teaching at the Houghton Academy. On two or three occasions when I had exhausted my resources she, without solicitation, came to my rescue -- a remarkable woman committed to the Lord. May God bless her memory.

Following my Masters work at Wheaton I considered teaching -- had one significant contact at what is now Southern Wesleyan University -- but that opening did not materialize. I turned to parish ministry, being assigned to develop a new Wesleyan Church in Cheektowaga. No building, no membership, a list of interested people but with God=s help and the arrival of my wife on the scene, a church was developed and grew until we had two services.

At the suggestion of the conference president -- reluctantly -- we went to an established church, second largest in the conference (Houghton being the largest), and had seven years of significant ministry. We witnessed growth, purchased property for a new church, and then encountered delays which allowed us to reflect upon a doctoral program. I had taken classes at the Bradford Campus of University of Pittsburgh studying German, readying myself for my doctoral languages exams.

The application process began and I was accepted at University of Iowa and University of Pittsburgh and ultimately at Brandeis University.

Ultimately, I say, for a mistake at some level resulted in rejection for a Brandeis Ph.D. program in English. I read it as providential and was willing to close this chapter. Annalee wasn't and after some clarifying calls I was accepted -- but then -- couldn't go -- on the one hand because of family, but more because Houghton came to me, inviting me to join the faculty.

This was late June. The academic year that had just concluded was a sad year in Houghton's history. A major disagreement arose relative to the wearing of the engagement ring. The administration, supposedly speaking for the church, felt that such was unacceptable. Sharp disagreements developed which led to a mass exodus of faculty. Religion and Philosophy lost two faculty members and I was invited to fill one of those vacancies. The brevity of my interview (although I personally knew both the dean and the departmental chair) and the rapid assignment of courses which no one else would teach, now in retrospect, remind me how desperate the college was. This was what you would call scraping the bottom of the barrel.

My first year at Houghton was an eye-opener. In faculty meetings I witnessed, to use the words of Acts, a sharp disagreement between Stephen Paine and Claude Ries. Often I wanted a place to hide. Here were two saints in total open disagreement.

I had planned to go to Brandeis at the end of that first year but the college asked me to stay on another year and indeed that appeared to be wise. I continued my study of German with Bob Cummings and also worked on my Hebrew.

At the end of the second year I received a graduate study leave and with my family went to Massachusetts. Here again the providence of God can be seen. Dr. Harold Kuhn of Asbury Theological Seminary had just concluded a year's leave of absence for post doctoral studies at Harvard. While at Cambridge he was the interim pastor of a church in West Medway. Learning of that empty pulpit, contacts were made which ultimately led to our being called as pastor.

The Community Church of West Medway was a large federated Baptist and Congregational Church. What a wonderful experience! I would have Baptist deacons stand with me when I baptized babies and congregational deacons, when I baptized believers by immersion. This was a gracious congregation, caring generously for all of our needs. For the first time in my ministry the board was composed principally of business men who did not ask -- as had been my previous experience --"Do you need a raise?"-- to which I had been taught the answer of the consecrated was "No!" but proceeded to give raises and to care for all our needs.

The church witnessed significant growth necessitating the building of a large educational unit -- in a year when the local school budget was turned down, causing some to say that a new church building will never be approved -- but it was and was funded!

The church was delighted to have me pursue graduate studies which they believed impacted my preaching.

What can I say about Brandeis? Not enough! A full scholarship and a fellowship. All my Ph.D. costs covered except for one payment of $250.00. Further, I had the privilege of studying with titans: Nahum Sarna, Cyrus Gordon, Dwight Young and Moshe Weinfeld.

Our life was busy with the university and the church but I was careful and so was Annalee to maintain a quality family life. Neither of us would have sacrificed our three children -- all Houghton graduates -- for any personal advancement! Busy but wonderful years.

My residency finished, my language exams behind me, admitted to candidacy, enjoying my parish ministry when I received a call from Warren Woolsey, reminding me that Houghton needed me to return. Annalee was clear that we should return then, I was a bit more reluctant with the dissertation not yet finished. But we did return. Two years later my dissertation was accepted and the degree conferred.

During my second year that I was at Brandeis I was nominated for a Sachar Scholarship which provided for a year=s study in Israel and would have funded the cost for my wife and three children to go with me. I became a finalist along with a Jewish Rabbi for the two Sachar Scholarships offered that year, but when funding was cut, reducing the program to a single scholarship, the erudite Jewish Rabbi was chosen to go. We obviously were disappointed but as it turned out this was not a denial but a delay to a more appropriate time. For when we returned to Houghton I was invited to be chaplain at the Institute of Holy Land Studies for the summer of 1975 and along with my wife and son we spent the summer in Israel with two large groups of Wheaton students.

We could not totally separate ourselves from parish ministry so on our return to Houghton we accepted an appointment to two churches in The Western New York Conference of the United Methodist Church -- Hinsdale and Ischua -- which we continue to serve. These wonderful parishioners, the salt of the earth, have allowed us Sunday after Sunday to get off the island and be in the real world!

It would be impossible to tell you this morning all the wonderful things that have happened to us here at Houghton. Again one can see the faithfulness and the goodness of God. Chair of the Division of Religion and Philosophy for 21 years, some 20 trips abroad with extended stays in Israel and England, and a multitude of conferences and conventions along with many publications have made these year most meaningful.

But this presentation was to deal with my faith journey. I have already indicated that faith has been a part of my life from my earliest recollections and has continued to be a vital part of my life to this day.

I told Dr. Lewis that I neither would nor could provide facile answer to the complexities of faith. Sensational answers like sensation experiences are not a part of my pilgrimage. Ready made answers that simply need water added and microwaved at a power of 10 for 30 seconds are not a part of my presentation -- or of my life, or, if I may change the figure of speech or confuse them as Archie Bunker would have done, Saul's armor may have worked for him but not for David.

Maturing in faith does not necessarily mean the elimination of questions but often the ability to live with them. Living both professionally and existentially in the Book of Job and Qoheleth with their profound questions, I take heart in the fact that the Bible and the Judeo/Christian faith tolerate questions and allow us to struggle with issues without being disowned by God.

A principle which has remained with me throughout my life was given me by a Methodist evangelist from some years ago -- Joseph Smith -- not original to him. He said, "Do not pray for the presence of God. That has been promised and is certain. Rather practice the presence of God." Practice the presence of God! What better criterion for faith development. Practice his presence even when the evidence of such may be scant.

I have sought to do this. One way has been through spot prayers. We are enjoined to pray without ceasing. Obviously, we cannot forever remain kneeling at the altar but I have found that I can remain in an attitude of prayer by breathing prayers when I hear sirens and emergency vehicles -- praying for both the person in need and the crew that is responding -- by breathing a prayer for people reported as having needs by news broadcasts, by praying for people when I pass their homes in my travels or by praying for you my students as I pass you on campus, and by praying for my parishioners as I walk the aisles of the churches and pass the pews where they habitually sit. So much of my life is a time of prayer. I recommend spot praying to you.

One further point in a climate that should be friendly to learning, to academics, but is not always so.

When considering a Ph.D. program I was warned that such could be harmful to my life of faith. I was told to go to a seminary and pursue biblical studies there, looking at a Th.D. degree. Stay within the household of faith.

Such advice did not deter me. In addition to Brandeis University I spent two summers studying at Yale and one summer each at Harvard and Cornell Universities. I believed then and I do now that if my faith cannot stand exposure to the light of learning then my faith may not be worth holding on to.

To some of my students I understand the words of Festus to Paul seemed most appropriate to me: "You are out of your mind, Paul. Too many books are driving you mad or too much learning is driving you insane."

Such a charge would be flattering and I would reply with Paul: "To this day I have had help from God, and so I stand here." To God be praise!

Back to Carl Schultz's Links

 Back to Houghton College Home Page